Why Is It That

~ my biggest fantasy right now is to acquire a sleep number bed?

~ the more laundry I do, the more there is; yet articles of my clothing go MIA?

~ I only have three tube socks? Not three pair, just three matching socks.

~ the radio stations around here insist on playing Billy Joel every hour?

~ every time I get close to making the sea monkeys my minions, their lawyer shows up, dripping sea water on my carpets, and brandishing more demands?

~ my motorcycle rides never last as long as they ought to?